View Full Version : Scared leaving rehab with 1 year clean from methamphetamine
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SWIM has been shooting up meth for 4 years on a daily basis until 4th of June 2007 when he was forced into rehab, since that he's been clean except a couple of relapses. because of meth he ruined his life and destroyed his family. Even after a year of sober (as the paper says) relatives still do not trust him.
Living as a meth addict was a pure hell and spending all nights breaking in to sheds and shit just to get cash for the next injection, damn why the hell did swim do it?
Still he thinks of meth every day and he cant imagine a life without it. He has been on rehab for almost a year now and now this summer he will get released. I wonder how long it will take till he's back on the track again?
take one day at a time. You will find your peace different time for different people.
Good luck
English_T
12-05-2008, 12:22
Exactly, take each day a day at a time - Don't set yourself a gruelling schedule. SWIM was addicted to H for ten + years but for the first time it doesn't bother him, he doesn't use anymore as it cost him so much - He lost everything a man could lose and in the end he thought look, drugs are meant to be fun, an addition to life not something which causes stress, loss, hassle and tons of other shit. SWIM knows that if he uses again it'll be 5 years down the line before he gets out of it again and his life will be worse than what it is now and he'll just be older. SWIM doesn't want to get to the end of his life and look back at it and see that he did fuck all with it!
SWIM gets offered free smack all the time but he turns it down BUT he has used a couple of times but he doesn't let it become two, three days of using. SWIM likes drugs and will use what he wants when he wants BUT he will NEVER be an addict again and will never let the drug control hin - he will control it. Heroin itself really doesn't interest SWIM anymore, and he is not sure exactly why, this is the first time where he has total control of himself again and it just doesn't interest him at all...its wierd.
thanks for your reply.
i feel you man
Exactly, take each day a day at a time - Don't set yourself a gruelling schedule. I was addicted to H for ten + years but for the first time it doesn't bother me, I don't use anymore as it cost me so much - I lost everything a man could lose and in the end I thought look, drugs are meant to be fun, an addition to life not something which causes stress, loss, hassle and tons of other shit. I know that if I use again it'll be 5 years down the line before I get out of it again and my life will be worse than what it is now and I'll just be older. I don't want to get to the end of my life and look back at it and see that I done fuck all with it!
I get offered free smack all the time but I turn it down BUT I have used a couple of times but I don't let it become two, three days of using. I like drugs and will use what I want when I want BUT i will NEVER be an addict again and will never let the drug control me - I will control it. Heroin itself really doesn't interest me anymore, and I am not sure exactly why, this is the first time where I have total control of myself again and it just doesn't interest me at all...its wierd.
I couldn't have said it better myself. There have been a few times SWIM has felt addiction to Amphetamines. Like he can't function without them. It all starts out for fun but when you need it to function thats where its bad.
All I can say is move away from all your friends and connections and start a new life. Keep away from people who do meth for years until you can lose all your cravings.
My cousin went through the same thing and moved to the middle of no where and did the same thing. Now shes moved back home with a fiance who went thorough the same thing and they have been clean for years with no sign of having a relapse.
desperado
28-05-2008, 19:19
try sniffing crystal meth once in a month or so, dont shoot it !!!
carousel
10-06-2008, 05:39
try sniffing crystal meth once in a month or so, dont shoot it !!!
he made it this far and you think he should follow your advice? thats shitty.
it took swim over a year of getting clean from meth/amphetamines before he was back on tracking seeing much improvement in his life. people are right when they say time. getting off meth makes you crazy, you think too much, dont wanna do anything, dont feel like you know how... maybe not as crazy as the meth makes you, but pretty close. time and hope man. keep trying, trying, and trying. if u aint ready to do that then i guess u aint ready to be clean. swim use to love meth now he hates it.
reduceNreact
18-06-2008, 01:59
Usually some people never get there self's back from Meth once they are there. depending on a lot of variables a lot of people are just doomed to relapsing over and over. swim has seen many people Never come back and very few, 2, recover completely. what those lonely two did was separate their selfs from the drug completely. the people, places and the things that reminded or even drove them to the crank. withdraws are the some of the worst mentally, and with out people to help swim thinks one could easily slip and fall right back in. its very easy to live in the moment, and very easy to say FUCK IT. but swim encourages anyone that desires to stop and can't, to seek help and usually one will find it. you'll be surprised at how many people will care about you, when you do.
cosmicruler
18-06-2008, 05:04
SWIM was addicted(smoked daily) for 5+ years,and swim is/has been clean for over 2 years now and feels pretty damn good.
Addiction is what swiy lets it be...physically and mentally its very hard to pick yourself back up,but its definatly doable!
Just take it 1 day at a time and try and get some normality in your life as soon as possible...join the gym,start eating healthy and drinking water,take supplements(swim takes L-Tyrosine and 5-HTP if feeling shitty) etc etc...
it all sounds lame and thats exactly what swim thought,but it helps and the rest is all you!
You have to want to change.
peace and good luck!
Tinanpornaremyfriends
07-08-2008, 00:51
Man I feel ya, I have 6 months clean after daily usage and it wrecking my life but am going back to where I used and think of it everyday as well, wonder how long it will be before I use again, stay strong bro..
Swim was a heavy user for 35 years, Swim never thought the cravings and desire for meth would go away. Made it one year before using again, and that 8th was a hell of a reminder why swim needed to stop. Staying away from others who use, all the old people, places and sources was key....and now with 2 years 10 months since that slip swim can honestly say that "need" to use seems to be gone. Without a doubt the toughest thing swim has done, at least now swim'll live long enough to keep fightin the fight. If swim could stop using....anyone can, just stay strong, never give in...make it one more day at a time....one more minute at a time without using if ya have to....
humdroid
03-09-2008, 05:16
No meth experience, but know speed is a sod.
Speed does this to people, so don't feel guilty, you havent done it again, and relapse is just another thing to work though.
<swimmy has just fallen after a break with base, but keeps reminding themself the wagon is there, waiting to be climbed back on>
SWIMMY wont feel guilty, even though she has caused harm in the past, as she has "lapsed" and not "relapsed" and since when did we chastiste learner bicycle riders when they fell off?
Lapses may not happen, and swimmy succeed when abstinent by seeing swimmys self as a straightie who has to be careful of phet falls due to a slight tendency.
Maybe you are not ready to leave rehab.
Speed is such a bore, it occupies swimmys mind even when not on it.
Speed kills enthusiasm, but luckily, for this ex addict, it often kills enthusiasm for taking the stuff.
Supplements for mind and body, and google are your friend. Keywords are from your own head, when searching. Theres a thread on here, go through the "new posts" and its a few pages in. Sorry for no link, I cant think of title. Something like "always on SWIM mind"
((NeVeReVeReVeN))
07-09-2008, 07:06
swim is also going thru rehab. he was a "poly-numerous addict". addicted and sold almost everything, except meth, Very rare around these parts. it is extremely hard to go day to day with having all the cravings and triggers and still have people asking to buy/sell them to swim. everyday using drugs goes thru his thoughts 2 or 3 times and hopes one day they wont. its like those non-smoking commercials, u have to relearn how to live your life. but we will live better ones after all, i hope. live one second without using, let it turn into one minute, then one hour, then one day, and live one day at a time. stay strong, swim is trying to also.
This section looks so empty :(
SWIM has been shooting up meth for 4 years on a daily basis until 4th of June 2007 when he was forced into rehab, since that he's been clean except a couple of relapses. because of meth he ruined his life and destroyed his family. Even after a year of sober (as the paper says) relatives still do not trust him.
Living as a meth addict was a pure hell and spending all nights breaking in to sheds and shit just to get cash for the next injection, damn why the hell did swim do it?
Still he thinks of meth every day and he cant imagine a life without it. He has been on rehab for almost a year now and now this summer he will get released. I wonder how long it will take till he's back on the track again?
SWIY is sure you will be fine.
maybe swiy should look at trying to extend his rehab period by a couple of months(if this is an option)swim guesses that the system in sweeden works similar to the uk were funding has to be secured,so this could well be difficult.but the bottom line my freind is if you dont feel ready to face life on your own doing so can be very difficult.