Boyfriend addicted to amphetamines

[Troubled-Girl]

My boyfriend is addicted to speed which causes him to be irritable and emotionally detached.He become very unloving and unaffectionate and gets very defensive over the slightest thing, which often results in him throwing insults.He seems totally unaware of how hurtful his actions are, and I would be long gone by now if I believed that he was a nasty person, but he isn't.This stuff has changed him.Is there anyone else out there who is or has been addicted to amphetamines, or someone who has been in my situation who can relate to what I have said?I really want to understand what is going on and reassure myself that it's the drugs talking and not really him.

[paulywould]

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Hopefully it is the drugs. Addiction causes a lot of people to become 'monsters'. Many of us have lost relationships because of that. He will keep on doing what he is doing until the pain or consequences get to great. That might just be you threatening to leave if he doesn't clean up-but you have to be willing to do so. Then you will find out if he is more serious about you or the drugs. If he is totally unaware of the way he acts when he is high do not confrot him on the matter until he sobers up. Then calmly explain how he is hurting you and your relationship. Give him a chance or two after you speak with him, but don't give him too many. That will hurt both of you. Many people do use again but not all.


Ohh yeah, don't accuse him of being a drug addict. Drug addicts hate that. Tell him how he makes you feel when he is high, how he makes you feel when he is not high. He should understand from that.</TD></TR>
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[Ex-Tweaker]

I've been there...I was a meth addict. Though I didn't have time for a relationship (If I did, it wouldn't last). Usually you have to let him run his course and let him hit a bottem. You don't have the power to change him, he must be the one whowants to change. 12 step programs (Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, Cocaine Anonymous) have had very good results. I've been totally sober for a year now, so don't give up hope.

[Dj_chill]

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Hey, I have been addicted to base for roughly a year and a half, the way you describe your boyfriend's behaviour is so familiar to me. I have extreme mood swings, suffer from paranoia( Due to low self esteem as well as the base)and I know only too well how your boyfriend must make you feel. This drug gets hold of you before you know it( While your still in the denial phase!!)and even although I know that sometimes I act completely psychotic one minute and the next Im happy-go-lucky, laugh a minute etc...I hate the way I act sometimes and can see that I'm fucking things up but cant help myself( Or wont).
I reckon your bf knows exactly what this drug is doing to you, him and your relationship, Its not that he wants to act this way it is the drug, but sometimes it just has too powerful a grip on people.
Tell him how you feel and take things from there, but always remember to look out for number 1- YOU!!
Hope you get things sorted xx</font></font></font>

[tweakerfrommars]

I am a recovered meth addict myself, and yes it is the drugs. When heavy use first starts, it seems as if no real change has taken place from a social standpoint, but after awhile (as little as a month or less), it becomes really bad. As with the other repliers in this topic, I destroyed many friendships and nearly cut myself off from my family and loved ones forever. What makes this situation most difficult is that the addict generally doesn't realize what he/she is doing to the people around them, until (as an above post says) a rock-bottom situation is reached.


Even if you explain the situation to your boyfriend, most likely it still won't sink in until he is in a situation in which he is forced to fully consider his current lifestyle.


Call it tough love, but I'd recommend that you break off the relationship for the time being, which may force him to realize what he has done wrong (and still may not). With luck and willpower on his part, he may be ready to repair the relationship in time. You could stick with him and continue to be hurt, hoping things will get better... but do they ever?

[tweakerfrommars]

"Ohh yeah, don't accuse him of being a drug addict. Drug addicts hate that."


And this is so true. Especially if he is still in denial about his addiction, this is the ultimate insult, and in his eyes you will become the "bad guy". Tell him you think he has a problem, whatever, just don't use specific words like "addict" or "junkie", or even "tweaker" (as per his specific addiction). It's an honor to be referred to as a tweaker by a fellow addict, but from a person "on the outside", not so much.

[paulywould]

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<TD id=HB_Focus_Element vAlign=top width="100%" background="" height=250 UNABLE="off">When you're not using that much and there aren't many negative effects you are able to quit but you don't want to. When are are using much more, getting many negative side effects and want to quit you're unable to. That's when you need outside help. Someonementioned NA. That has worked for me as well. somepeople like rehab, But no one will try anything until they can't stand what their life has becaome. Help him se that and you'll help him recover</TD></TR>
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