Thought process of addiction: Addiction=Ambivalence

[Nicaine]

Don't want to sound like I'm lecturing, but I'm an old timer with too much experience (& not enough motivation) and I want to share what I know.



Addiction = Ambivalence



Exact same thing, different words.



am•biv•a•lence(am biv‚ƒ lƒns) n.coexistence of conflicting thoughts or feelings.



Classic example:



(A) I want to quit this shit, bad.

(B) I want to use this stuff, bad.

(C) Both of the above are equally true for me.



That is addiction, not only in a nutshell but there is literally nothing more to it than the A-B-C above (despite all the societal hoo-haah).



Solve the ambivalence in some way and you are cured. There are ways to do this, you just have to look for them.



Stay ambivalent and you can and will go your whole life struggling and fighting with yourself. Forever, to no end, no matter 9000 meetings in 90 days.



Recovery is a different story (it happens after you solve the ambivalence). Just going to meetings is IMHO a very slow way. Attack it at the A-B-C level above and you're on the fast track.



That's it... I hope you the reader think about this for a moment (even if it sounds like a lecture) and copy/paste this post. Then think about it. Sorry if I sound like an ass, but here's my credentials: at least 4 inpatient treatments, read about 15 books on the subject, studied the topic on the Net for a few years, and attended AA/NA on and off since 1986.



Peace...

[Jingleballicks]

Yup, I agree. That's the thing. Something that will help me get off of coke is that the high is great... only for a short period of time. And is it worth a hole in your septum, missing teeth, skin and bones?


Nope, it ain't worth it. But lets see if I can put my money where my mouth is. I'm wired, and have been since about 9 o'clock last night, had to go to class, and it was horrible, couldn't blow my freaking nose for an HOUR! Can you imagine, it was so bad when I swallowed my nose would make a noise because of all the pressure. But you know what. Coke is an interesing high, first your HIGH HIGH, then your LOW LOW looking for another line, but it can't happend, you kinda go into a limbo.

[betsym]

Jingleballicks, the more coke swiy does, the shorter the high and the worse the side effects. After awhile, the high will not be so great or so high, either. Tolerance builds up with time, making it not worthwhile at all. In addition to this, swiy never knows when the next line might be the last. Coke can have a different effect every time swiy does it, be it a stroke, heart attack, seizure, or a combination. Swiy can become sensitive to even a small amount, resulting in much worse come-downs and side effects, not to mention death.Swim would say that it is definitely not worth it. A two-second high is not worth the life-long risk swiy's body will have if swiy keeps up the use of cocaine. Coke is a drug which makes swiy feel all-powerful while at the same time robbing swiy of the power to feel anything but self-destructive, always wanting more, anything to avoid the depression which inevitably follows. Swiy can get out of limbo. The thought of another line may always be there, just on the outside reaches of your mind, but you can control it instead of letting it control you. Take it one day at a time. Read everything you can about it. Convince swiy that they do not want coke but want to live instead.
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